Tuesday, May 13, 2014

I slit the sheet, the sheet I slit; and on the slitted sheet I sit (and then some). Ah, Language.

In preparation for a workshop after school yesterday (and in anticipation to the importance to highlighting Speaking and Listening skills, K-8), I introduced teachers to an opening activity of tongue twisters. The instructions were simple, "Do not laugh. Use your best pronunciation. Try to be proper with Queen's English. Pretend you are being recorded for a televised radio show. This followed, of course, with highlighting the national standards, the importance of teaching students to READ for audio recordings and multimedia presentations, and to push our understanding of language beyond textual words to be read, into those which should be spoken. And with that, I challenge you to do your best with these (and yes, many are meant to push the boundaries of appropriateness - which is my point for proper pronunciation). Good Luck.

I am not the pheasant plucker,
I'm the pheasant plucker's mate.
I am only plucking pheasants
Because the pheasant plucker's late.

I slit the sheet, the sheet I slit;
and on the slitted sheet I sit.

One smart fellow; he felt smart.
Two smart fellows; they felt smart. Three smart fellows; they all felt smart.
I'm not the fig plucker,
Nor the fig pluckers' son,
But I'll pluck figs
Till the fig plucker comes.

Six stick shifts stuck shut.
A twister of twists once twisted a twist; A twist that he twisted was a three-twisted twist;
If in twisting a twist one twist should untwist, The untwisted twist would untwist the twist.

A flea and a fly in a flue
Said the fly "Oh what should we do"
Said the flea "Let us fly"
Said the fly "Let us flee"
So they flew through a flaw in the flue.

Silly Sally swiftly shooed seven silly sheep.

Denise sees the fleece,
Denise sees the fleas.
At least Denise could sneeze
and feed and freeze the fleas.

A skunk sat on a stump.
The stump thought the skunk stunk.
The skunk thought the stump stunk
What stunk the skunk or the stump?

There was a fisherman named Fisher,who fished for some fish in a fissure.
Till a fish with a grin,
pulled the fisherman in.
Now they're fishing the fissure for Fisher.

The seven silly sheep Silly Sally shooed shilly-shallied south.
These sheep shouldn't sleep in a shack; sheep should sleep in a shed.

One-one was a race horse.
Two-two was one too.
One-one won one race.
Two-two won one too.

Billy Button bought a buttered
biscuit,did Billy Button buy a buttered biscuit?
If Billy Button bought a buttered
biscuit,Where's the buttered biscuit
Billy Button bought??

To sit in solemn silence in a dull dark dock, In a pestilential prison with a life long lock, Awaiting the sensation of a short sharp shock, From a cheap and chippy chopper on a big black block.

I need not your needles, they're needless to me; For kneading of noodles, 'twere needless, you see; But did my neat knickers but need to be kneed, I then should have need of your needles indeed.

If you understand, say "understand".
If you don't understand, say "don't understand". But if you understand and say "don't understand". How do I understand that you understand? Understand!

Dr. Johnson and Mr. Johnson,
After great consideration,
Came to the conclusion
That the Indian nation
Beyond the Indian Ocean
Is back in education
Because the chief occupation is cultivation.

Once upon a barren moor
There dwelt a bear, also a boar.
The bear could not bear the boar.
The boar thought the bear a bore.
At last the bear could bear no more
Of that boar that bored him on the moor, And so one morn he bored the boar. That boar will bore the bear no more.

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